一场秋雨一场寒

怎么与人相处,这几乎是人一辈子的困扰。在年轻的时候,我们大多比较随性,与明友交,恨不得剖开肺俯。“真诚”、“坦荡”之类,是常常挂在嘴边的字眼。

今年教师节,我的好明友讨,在微信群发了条祝福的信.息几 S 老师很高兴,回复说:谢谢你还记得老师!这是件很正常的事情,但我却有些不安 ― 群里只有我们三个人。

我后悔没有早点看到消息,也跟着发上一条祝福。我左思右想,不回复总是不好,于是也打了几行字:还是 W 哥有心,咱们和老师好长时间没见,年底一定要聚一聚。发完了,还是觉得气氛有点尴尬。S 老师也没再回复。

不过讨也意识到这个问题,立马给我私信:让兄弟难堪了,我应该单独发信息的,让你附和不好.不附和也不好。我说没有没有。讨说,让我瞎说一会算了,哈哈。于是讨又在群里说:哈哈.老赵谦虚了,还是你提醒我找这个群的 ― 那边天气怎么样了?我这边开始有转凉的趋势啦,一场秋雨一场寒啊。

教师节祝福辛件,对我很有触动。按理说,我和讨是至交好友,不该如此油腻.拐弯抹角。好明友之间,亲人之间,总该以真诚为上。但何为真诚?年纪越大,我越搞不懂了。生活中常常有这样的事,明明真心为对方,却不被对方接受,甚至产生误解。

中国人以前讲的人情礼节,年轻的我们向来是不屑一顾的,并斥之为“虚伪”。也许是上了年纪的缘故吧,我渐渐以为.即便是“客套”里面,也有真感情。比如“逢人且说三分话,不可全抛一片心”,以前恨死这句话了,两面三刀。但很多时候,真的不适合把心里的话,都向人说起,这不仅仅是尊重别人,也是尊重自己。“我说话直.你别放在.心上”,我们总习惯于这样为自己开脱.为自己的口舌打掩护。

“我说话支”,这难道不是真诚的表现吗?

嗯,一场秋雨一场寒呐。

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